.we.have.hope.
.Over. these past couple of days God has been so good in
showing me rays of his hope and his love through watching the women and
children here at HOH. Some days are hard to see past the smoke and the here and
now to see the glimmers and rays and bright lights of HOPE that God gives.
.It’s. always easy to see the mess of life before seeing the
big picture or the light at the end of the tunnel. That’s true for
anyone..anywhere..any time. I often share with others about my walk through and
away from addictions in this way. Describing them as intense and covering it’s
like I look out all I see is my addiction.
.All. I can see is the hardness of saying no to whatever
that thing that I don’t want to do is up in my face...again.
.You. know you have been there. Be it addiction to drugs,
alcohol, coffee, brownies…that feeling that all you can think about is that one thing that you CAN’T do or let
yourself have.
.I. know I’ve been there. On my floor crying out to God to
move in my heart…to teach me how to WANT
Him the way I used to want vodka or self-injury or any of my other go-to
addictions.
.It’s. in those moments that I began to learn the power of
the ultimate hope we…as followers of Jesus…have. That even when my _______________________
(fill in the blank with whatever addiction I was fighting or you are fighting)
looked to be bigger than God and sometimes better…all I had to do was to chose
to look past that thing that was so close to me. The reason why it looked so
big was just that…it was just near. I have learned and am learning that those
things…past addictions…come in waves. They look really big and hard and
unstoppable as it’s coming but in the end it hits the sand and it looses its
power.
.That’s. hope. That’s God. That’s the hope he has put in our
hearts as Jesus followers.
.Sometimes. it’s easy for me to get caught up in the here
and the now living with the girls and women at HOH. It’s easy to see the girls
being typical girls and being mean to one another and want things to be
different. It’s easy to go to a place of thinking that these girls have a long
road ahead of them.
.This. week God did a really sweet thing in teaching me more
about himself and his character…his deep desire to see his people restore and
healed.
.There. is one girl that I have connected really well with.
She is 13. Spunky. Fun. Tender. She and I would have been troublemakers
together if we were the same age.
.She. also has one of the more brutal stories of the girls
here at HOH.
.This. precious little one was found in a ditch at the age
of three. A Nicaraguan family adopted her…in Nica adoption isn’t because you
necessarily want a child…it’s more
like you want a servant. Her adoptive parents began pimping her out at a tender
young age. She was (and is) a fighter. She became uncontrollable and would not
obey orders to service the clients that would come in to her home. Her “family”
would chain her to a stone wall. This precious child had chains on her neck and
around her ankles and was lead in to service the “clients” when she was called
upon. She’s lived off and on at the HOH over the past couple of years and has
experienced great growth and healing.
.I’ve. had the privilege of living next to a real life hero.
.She. is a survivor of unthinkable pain.
.She. is what I think of when I think of hope on display for
all to see.
.I. say that because the other day she and another girl had
teamed up and were just being mean and ugly to me in what they were saying. I
ignored what they were saying and I walked to my room. She ran before me and
jumped in my hammock. I sat on the steps of my porch and crumpled in the hurt
that God had for her. Seeing her reason for being so mean and ugly to me (to
anyone) as an out-pouring of her hurt and pain on the inside. I sat there praying
for her and for hope of healing. She got up and gave me the “I hate you” look
and walked away. I continued praying for her as I sat there on my porch. As I
felt God come close I felt such an overwhelming sense of his love for her…for
the other girls…I was brought to tears.
.God. loves us just so much…we’ve only scratched the
surface.
.She. came back around the corner saying mean hurtful things
once more. She sat on the bottom step calling me names as I sat with my head in
my knees not wanting her to know I was crying…sobbing may actually be a better
word. She realized I was crying and picked my head up. As soon as she realized
I was crying she immediately burst into tears.
.So. there we were…sitting on my steps…crying…and hugging
one another.
.She. said she was sorry for calling me names. I let her know
that of course I forgive her. I told her I love her and God loves her a whole
lotta. We sat on my porch hugging and crying…and eventually giggling for a long
time.
.Here. was a young girl who struggles to express any kind of
real/raw emotion…crying with me. That
right there is hope my friends! That no matter how far gone we are…no matter
how hurt and broken we are…there is hope. The source of all hope is Jesus and
that he lives. That the Holy Spirit lives inside of those who have surrendered
their lives to him…there is always hope.
.No. matter what my precious girl has been through she has
hope. Hope for beauty instead of ashes. Hope for healing. Hope for life in
Jesus. HOPE!
.No. matter what you or I did or will ever do will take away
the hope that Christ has offers us…if…we are his child. Nothing you or I have been through will
dictate our future as a child of God because there is always hope.
.As. a child of God there is always hope.
.Absolute.
.Unadulterated.
.Pure.
.HOPE.
P.S. Here’s my “on the lighter side of things” story: So
Sunday we were in the back of a taxi driving to one of the local markets in
Nica. One of my favorite things to do here is ride around in taxis because you
get to see so much and I just LOVE it! Anyways..so we come up to a stop light
and there on the right is a white brick building with green and white stripped
awnings. My first thought was, “Wow! That’s a really nice building for Nica!”
Then I noticed there were a lot of people around the building and in the
doorway. I quickly read the sign and determined it was a restaurant. I said,
“Hey guys let’s eat lunch there it looks like they probably have good food!” As
I’m saying this I re-read the sign. I’m trying to stop the words from coming
out of my mouth because upon my first quick reading of the sign I didn’t see
the smallest, yet most important word, “funeraria”, which in Spanish means
funeral parlor. Yep…that’s right friends…I wanted to dine at the funeral
parlor.
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