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.part. of me being obedient and starting to bring people into what God is doing..and has done in me sharing what God did back in October 2011. i'm not one to look back on the past..but this is something that God started back almost five months ago now..but it has meaning to what i feel God doing in me currently.

.deep. breath.

.God. gave me a vision back in October. a vision to be a family to his children who didn't have one..or didn't have a good one. to become a foster parent here in the 'burg. at this point i have only told a small handful of my close friends what God was stirring in me and that i would be making preparations to take that step of obedience. i began praying for my next step..and that God would show me when it was time to move towards it. when he was going to make this vision a reality. at that time in October..and currently..i am living with a close friend and her family. (God story w/ this too!) so i have the ability to save some funds and get my feet back on the ground from a few years of crazy living. i still have that vision deep inside of me. one of me being a "mom" per say to children who have been hurt. who better to understand them?

.i'm. still not 100% clear on what direction God is moving me in..but i do know that God is stirring that vision in such a way that i MUST move. must take a step towards what he opens up. this urgency is something new in me. i have been seeing God move in ways i never thought possible. i have seen him bring people into my life just this past week that expressed exactly what i feel God moving me towards. my new word to describe this past week is "weird". not that what is happening is weird..not that what God is doing in me is's just that i don't know what else to call it. or label it. it's just weird. and a good weird at that. it's God i know that for sure though.

.one. "weird" story is that i have been prompted to pray for someone i barely know. and when i say barely i mean i've met this person once..said maybe all of five words to each other and that's it. nonetheless i've prayed for this person. i started on monday really pouring out my heart for her. so much so that i was on the elliptical at the Y on friday and i went over my work out time b/c i was so deeply in prayer for her. (usually i'm counting down the seconds til i can get off the evil machine.) then on friday night..well sat. morning actually..i woke up to loud sobbing sounds. it took me a little while to realize the person making those noises was me. i had been crying in my sleep praying for her. in my dream i was praying for her..praying that God would move and work in her life. that she would move towards him in tough areas..and she was..and she was experiencing his freedom..his grace..his love. it brought me to tears. now i do a lot of things in my sleep..but sobbing loudly is NOT on that list..until now.

.God. is moving. he is in this. where he wants me to move from here is not 100% clear..but as i take steps of obedience i would greatly appreciate your prayers and encouragement.

.he. is worthy.


  1. Ash, I am excited with you and for you. God is doing amazing things in your life. Never doubt it, move on in faith believing He is who He says He is and will do a wonderful work in and through you. I love watching you responding to God while He unfolds your life into beautiful things. Praying for you.


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I'm not a writer.
(Don't judge my grammar/spelling, I do what I want.) :)
I'm not a blogger.
I am a sharer. (If that's a word.)
I shared my journey through living in Nicaragua.
I shared bits and pieces here and there as life unfolded post Nicaragua.

This post is coming from something deep. Something that is deep in my heart and has been a major part of what God has been teaching me through my year and a half back in the States.

Loss. {def. : be deprived of cease to have or retain.}

What is loss?

Loss can take on many different faces through our lives.
"I lost my car keys."
"I lost my teddy bear."
"I lost my glasses."
"I lost my grandmother."
"I lost my home."
"I lost my wife/husband."
"I lost my child."
"I lost my childhood."
"I lost my friend."
"I lost my ________."

So many different emotions arise as I read those statements. Some bring up a lightness in helping a young child find their t…